I Need Validation

It has been quite a while since I last posted anything here. Have been quite busy I have to admit, but less stress and definitely I had more time for myself compared to the same period last year. 

To tell you the truth, I have not touched (or finished) a book in the first half of this year. Reading was something that I had to gave up for some reasons that I don't even know until now. So, to get my "spiritual" food, I turned to my iPhone. Owh yeah, I bought my new iPhone about 2 months ago - finally.... Browsing through Youtube and searching for the Renaissance Woman herself, Oprah, I always find myself eager to listen to her and learning something new from her all the time. Last week, I learned about validation. She said that after each interview she had, from a murderer till Beyonce herself, they would ask Oprah, "How did I do?", "Was that OK?"...

Same goes to myself. Constantly, and at times whether I did know it or not, I am consistently seeking validation from others. At times I can be easily ignored by others, as if I am a piece of transparent sheet of glass. I need more than that, and I do think I deserve more than that. If that person could not provide me with such validation, then I decided that I better move on. What they should had better understood is the 3rd law of motion - with every force, there will be an equal and opposite force in return. If you do not validate me, I am done with you!

While writing this, I am (still) not sure whether can I in return validate myself. For instance like taking better care of myself, eating on time, having a break for myself... Is that validation? Or does this kinda validation still requires from someone's else perspective?

My 2 cents on this matter, take good care of yourself first. 

Which God is God

Right! The reason for me kinda "abandoning" my own blog was because I'd always wanted to change the blog's header photo and then start blogging fresh. But I'm that busy and never had the time to take photo and replace that header. Soon perhaps... once I had the time.

So this is just something that I wanted to write because suddenly I've thought of it, and managed to share the idea with one of my colleague (who is a Muslim).

We were talking about God, and how a close friend of mine would always pray for my success in uni days during Friday prayers, especially during exams. And I always reciprocate by saying, "Whatever you prayed for me, I'm praying equally the same if not more for you. At the end of the day, the God you pray to, is the same God that I am praying".

Quickly I explained to my colleague, I said its like going to KLCC from Penang. Some may opt to take flight (#PrayForMH370), some may drive through the highway, some stopped at Taiping and took the old road to KL. These different routes are what I call "religions", whereas the ultimate goal of reaching KLCC is God. So you see, our destiny is the same, just that our way to our destiny is different.

Ah-ha! What a day... It was lovely to get such an enlightenment in the midst of a normal workday.

The Murphy's Law

Well I've definitely heard of the name of this Law, but I could not recall what exactly this Law meant. All I could remember vividly was Le Chatelier's Principals. But little do we know, these 2 laws can be used to explain life and our actions. 

Today we commissioned a rather important project in my workplace, and thus, I've been working non-stop since last Friday. My boss gave me a piece of advice that was rather chemistry and stochastic, "Kelv, remember the Murphy's Law". I nodded and smile, but I couldn't recall at all what did that meant! Now listen carefully, I am not gonna repeat myself. Here goes...

Lesson 1.0 - Murphy's Law

If you feel that something is gonna go wrong, that means it will definitely go WRONG! There is always a reason why your instincts are communicating to you.

Example: I somehow felt that the project commissioning at my workplace was done rather in a hurry, and I believe there must be some parts or equipments that may fail. Thus, I instructed for a trial load the night before the commissioning. Turned out, I was right! Equipment failure here and there. Thank God we managed to identify it early, and got it rectified immediately. And thus, it was a flawless operations today during the actual commissioning.


Lesson 2.0 - Le Chatelier's Principles

Also known as the equilibrium principle, it can be simply explained as if you don't move something out, nothing much (or more) will be produced until there is this change. 

Example: I found out that someone is unhappy about me, and unfortunately that person choose to share about this in social medium, of which I had excess to as well. So much of a smart Alex!!! I was utterly pissed and the first reaction I had was that I wanted was a revenge. But then I felt so emotionally unstable and disturbed. Finally it took a person (who is by the way younger than me) to teach me to just let it go. When I forgive, then I forget, I became happier instantly and really no longer mind what that person has to say about me. Chapter closed. When you moved on, thing gets better. 

Life class lessons indeed!

All It Takes Is Just A Fresh Sentence

If you find yourself stuck in a conversation, and "ego" is hiding behind you, just remember this little secret - all it takes is just a fresh sentence (of words). And believe me, its a gateway to amazing conversation after that.

Look, I am working 6 days, 6 nights starting from yesterday till this Sunday and obviously I am dead tired. But I carefully realized that people are trying to start a conversation with me, but I was too "occupied" to response. Thus I quickly noticed that they are refraining from myself. But when I approached them and started a fresh sentence, things got better (eventually) or shall I say, BACK TO NORMAL.

Try it! Amazing things happen when you say YES!

Who is Joe?

Well, Joe is Kelvin's alter ego. Just like Beyonce's alter ego is Sasha Fierce. So the normal "engineer" you see working is actually Kelvin, and the fierce photos of what looks like Kelvin is actually Joe.

Now, this is Joe...

Joe is stunning, confident, successful, cheerful and like what some would say, "He's HOT!".

This, poor thing on the other hand is Kelvin.

Kelvin is rather quiet, workaholic and does not gives a sh*t on his appearances, AT ALL! He can be at times seen as sloop-ish and untidy. But then again, he is a qualified Chemical Engineer working with the national oil company!!!

So Kelvin and Joe goes hand-in-hand. You can't have Kelvin without Joe, nor having Joe with Kelvin would be too bootylicious!

Hahaha... jokes aside, but really I am better known as Joe (or Chow or Choe) by most of my close relatives. This is how it happened. You see, when a baby is born, the typical Chinese parents don't get to choose their baby's name as they wished. They would have to consult someone from the temple to pick the right name for their baby. So the "temple" gave two picks for my parents... Chow and Liang.

My mum straightaway agreed with Chow, hence the complete (and looooong) name would be Kelvin Yew Kean Chow. But when they presented this name to my great-grandmother, she said, "Are you guys crazy? He would be teased 'Kin Cheow' from his friends when he grow up!!!" Kin Cheow in Hokkien simply meant BANANA. Thanks great-grandma!

And thus Madam Lim and Mr. Yew reselected the name, Kelvin Yew Kean Liang for me. But then the weird thing is that, my close family members still recognizes me as Joe, till date! Weird right? Why name someone when you can't call them using their real name?

So long story short, yes, I am a person with multiple names. Call me what you want, I'll still answer with a smile. Peace out peeps!

This Is How A Friendship Ends

I can't remember his name. He was a Chinese guy, who was our facilitator for our orientation program when we first joined the company. He loves to relate stories to all of us, lessons learnt as he calls it.

There is one specific story that I've learnt from him.

And I quote...

"Guys, you should take a relationship or friendship like stacks of eggs. The more you know that person, the more stacks of eggs you carry. But eggs are so fragile that it can be easily broken, and so is relationships. Give space to each other, know your boundaries and learn to live by yourself without depending too much on the other person. You will see, that these stacks of eggs will last forever."

I am facing a turmoil friendship as of now but I know I can definitely handle this better than before. Just that, its consuming me just a little too much. Leaving for Kuantan tomorrow, let's just hope things will be better when I return back to Penang.

Miracles Do Happen

Miracles do happen, but it depends on how you 'perceives' it. That's another Ah-Ha moment that I've received this week.

My aunt and cousin dropped by for a visit yesterday after the morning mass at St. Anne's sanctuary. Owh yeah, its St. Anne's feast last weekend. I attended the candle lighting event on Saturday night itself, with heaps of people that you can barely walk. If you are wondering who is St Anne, she's the mother of Virgin Mary, the grandmother of Lord Jesus. Also knows as Saint Anna in some places. She is known to have kind heart and healing power. For me, I prayed to a better person, and help me to help others while I'm looking for success for myself.

My aunt continued her story of felling down at a market in India she'd recently visited. According to her, it was so painful that she was limping her way to church. During one of the prayers, the Priest said out loud, there's a person whose leg is suffering in pain. Worry not, the Lord is healing that person just right now. And I guess you guys should know how the story went. Miraculously, her leg was OK the day after. She added, miracles do come to a person in so many different ways, it depends on how you perceive it. Very true indeed. 

In fact, if you've ever read the book The Secret from Rhonda Byrne, you can learn on how miracles are created, by YOURSELF.

Great week to come!